Twenty-one years had passed, and I’d never had a boyfriend.  Why would this year be any different?

At the start of my junior year in college, my best girlfriend and I had chosen to remain single for the school year and lead a small group for single women at our church.  It had become our own joke with all of our friends that she and I would walk down the aisle with our walkers, dentures, gray hair, and therapeutic shoes.  We both figured, at the rate we were going, we’d be through menopause before saying our “I do’s”, and at that point the mere thought of getting married may be enough to bring on a heart attack.  But, we both knew God was in control, and His timing is perfect.  He had kept us single for a reason, and would continue to do so only to bring us closer to Him.

Having both read “I’ve Kissed Dating Goodbye” and “Single and Content”, we both agreed that dating random people here and there was a waste of time and causes more heartache than happiness.  We were both picky, and we wanted to meet the men whom God planned for us, and grow as friends before moving any further.  For years, we’d each kept a list of qualities we wanted in a man.  We’d prayed for it, and just knew God would someday provide the perfect man for each of us.  But, it was throughout my junior year that I heard God gently, quietly, but ever so persistently say, “I don’t want your list, I want your life.”

“But, God,” I would reply. "These are the things that make up a good Christian who’s fun and perfect for me.”  Still, He said, “I don’t want your list, I want your life.” 

Finally, after years of holding onto my list and revising the many things my future husband would have to live up to, I gave it up to God.  I went to an incredible weekend conference and knew God wasn’t joking about this.  I came home and my best friend and I burned the list, prayed, and gave complete control to the Lord.

Just five months after this, I began dating a man I had met nearly a year before.  The Lord has revealed qualities in him that I never would have thought to ask for.  He’s taught me so much about myself, and he’s one of my best friends.  Yes, some of the qualities on my list are found in him, but they don’t matter anymore.  The only thing God wants me to have is a man devoted to Him.  You see, no matter how many things we think we want in order to make a person perfect for us, there’s always something else.  No one is perfect, and it’s when we realize this that God is able to work in and through us to make a relationship based solely on the love of Christ.

Don’t give God a list of your wants, give Him your life.  Psalm 37:4 states, “Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.”  There’s no need to tell God what’s best for you, He already knows.  He gives you your heart’s desires.