Devolution of Decency
By Travis K. McSherley
[February 2004]

Whither has chivalry gone?  I shall tell you.  We have killed it -- you and I.

Case studies attesting to chivalry's demise could fill volumes, but one need look no further than current popular culture, as it continues to chip away at the very conscience of society.  Two recent examples come from the NFL season, which on Feb. 1 concluded just as it began -- with cultural controversy.  During a hugely hyped preseason concert on the National Mall in Washington, DC, Britney Spears left little to the imagination as she flaunted herself before more than 100,000 people within earshot of the US Capitol Building.

After that "kickoff," who could be surprised by the fiasco of the Super Bowl halftime show that featured R-rated depravity -- not to mention an incident involving a mechanical failure on Janet Jackson's otherwise tasteful outfit.

Another pop "diva," Madonna, made headlines for smooching younger divas while singing her classy "Like a Virgin" at an MTV ceremony.

Despite their denials to the contrary, clothing retailer Abercrombie & Fitch had its Christmas catalog pulled off the shelves apparently due to complaints from individuals and family organizations.  The annual magazine featured sex tips, nudity, and photos encouraging or displaying many varieties of fornication.

Several performers have found it necessary to use profane language in accepting their prizes in television-broadcast awards programs.  Democratic presidential candidate John Kerry must have approved, since he then used the "F" word referring to President Bush's war policy in a Rolling Stone interview.  More recently, LA Lakers star Shaquille O'Neal was suspended for using the same vocabulary to describe NBA referees.

Now, using inappropriate language and celebrating fornication are hardly new phenomena.  Perhaps it would be futile to wish that someday they could be evicted from our society.  And frankly, despite the fact that MTV has been around as many years as I have, I probably haven't watched an hour of the channel throughout my existence.  So why should it matter to me what junk they want to show to their audience?

It does matter to me, though -- as a future husband and future father if nothing else.  What should cause each of us to be greatly disturbed by the recent flurry of controversial events is that they all took place in the public square, in full view of America.  On live television.  At a national landmark.  In front of our children.  This kind of stuff used to be reserved to X-rated films and "gentlemen's" clubs (which, of course, house no gentlemen).  Now that depravity has gone mainstream, how are we to grasp and maintain the values of self-control, dignity, and respect?

Obviously self-control is not considered a virtue in the MTV, "if it feels good do it" age.  Anything goes -- don't let a little conscience get in your way.  The whole world does not act like music video stars, thank goodness, but the explicit message to this generation is to seek personal pleasure at all costs.  Conscience is the first casualty in this war.  That we can see Janet Jackson or Britney Spears half-naked during family hour is the symptom of a deeper lapse in moral conviction.  As a culture, we have allowed traditional values to go by the wayside within our music, television, and movies -- which, in turn, lowers the standards of the more "sensitive" news media.

And allowing our moral defenses to drop in the pop culture inevitably parellels letting immorality ooze into society at large.  This has been obvious, I think, within our educational system, which has seen a distinct rise in promiscuity and violence in the past few decades.  And in education as well as many other areas, the disregard for virtues has translated into a complete lack of respect among people.  I stated that chivalry was dead -- for what is chivalry if not an expression of utmost respect?

Even the term "chivalry" today seems to invoke a backward and bygone era where women subjugated themselves to the patriarchal oppressors (which is, funny enough, the exact opposite of what the word really implies).  Am I saying that pop culture is to blame for the destruction of chivalry?  Not completely, but it certainly has fueled the fire.

I'm using "chivalry" in a very broad meaning applicable to any interpersonal relationship, but it's more traditional application is probably the most vivid example.  Could anyone even define what a "gentleman" is anymore?  Our views of men and women have become so distorted that we're not even sure being chivalrous is a positive thing.  After all, Justin Timberlake seemed to be having a good enough time dancing up there with Janet Jackson -- why can't they be the models for masculinity and feminity?  It is certainly the model that the culture preaches.  But anyone who thrusts himself at a woman and rips off her clothes is by no means a gentleman (and no one who flaunts herself like that could be considered a lady!).

Chivalry means respect.  When a man treats a lady with tenderness -- and even holds a door open for her or offers her a seat on the subway -- that's a sign of deep appreciation and respect for her personhood and feminity.  And going beyond the male/female relationship, it means being selfless and thoughtful, putting others ahead of oneself.  Therein lies the deep, deep chasm between pop culture and pure conscience.  Our celebrities (for the most part) have no respect for themselves when they offer unclean words and actions for public consumption, and they can therefore impart no respect to their viewers and fans.

This generation -- my generation -- is in terrible danger if we do not have leaders and role models who stand up for moral conviction and true manhood and womanhood.  It is encouraging that many of our recent cultural clashes have been met with outrage by organizations and families.  Will we be outraged enough to stop society from completely chipping away its conscience?

Make no mistake, that conscience is being bombarded.  As such, it becomes more difficult for us to be "shocked" by these crazy stunts.  How long before we just accept them as "the way things are"?  By removing the boundaries of moral constraint and respect, pop culture is a great threat -- but even greater is the threat from parents, preachers, politicians, and teachers who fail to act as living models of respect and chivalry.