At a time when the very concept of marriage is under fire, it's interesting to note that there are people -- younger people even -- who are starting to step back and say, "Whoa -- sex is a big deal!"

That, of course, is an understatement.  Sex and marriage are much more than a "big deal," because they strike at the very core of our emotional, physical, and spritual beings.  But it doesn't take a terribly extensive look at society to find them treated as mere outlets for personal pleasure and convenience, not so different from any other source of enjoyment.

Still, some are beginning to break free from this spell, it seems.  A survey by the National Campaign to Prevent Teen Pregnancy claims that nearly two-thirds of sexually active teenagers wish they had waited before giving their bodies away.  Other studies have shown a growing trend of young people committed to saving themselves. 

But in the midst of those encouraging numbers, how many kids who wish they had waited to have sex will alter their lifestyles to be chaste from now until marriage?  How many of those young enthusiasts for abstinence will still be untouched come their wedding night?  Those statistics are likely improving, too -- bless God -- but probably not enough to get excited about.  Sure, a lot of kids are signing cards of commitment to stay pure until marriage, but many are also tossing those pledges away for cheap lust.  Some studies suggest that over half break those covenants before the honeymoon.  So kids are getting the message, it seems, but not sticking to it often enough.  Why the disparity?  Because sex and marriage still aren't taken seriously enough, and they certainly aren't treated as God's gift.

The mass media is especially guilty of such flippancy.  So many movies, magazines, and sitcoms go to absurd lengths to glamorize fornication of any sort.  And reality television, which is anything but, has become a breeding ground for the most pathetic displays of anything and everything BUT true love.

"True love" -- whatever that is.  Commitment, service, unconditional devotion.  These concepts are lost most obviously on pop culture, but it's hard to deny their absence in many of the relationships we see played out in the workplace, in the community, or even in the church, regrettably.

This runs deep into the soul of society.  Much has been written lately (at least in conservative media, though some from the liberal side, too) about the loss of civility and respect and chivalry within American culture.  High school and college students seem particularly waning in this area, though their adult leaders are clearly not without blemish.  A man's word is no longer his bond.  Integrity is seen more as a stumbling block than as a valuable foundation.

The blame for this loss of virtue rests on a lot of shoulders, most notably on a general attitude of relativism that is slack to even define moral values.  But whatever the cause, the casualties are too much to bear.  Among them, the gift of marriage, which has been stripped of its strength.  And sex, which has lost much of its mystery and wonder.  How can our society have a soul at all if we destroy the most sacred of covenants?

Even using a word like "sacred" can get one labeled a radical, especially if it implies that some relationships don't fit that description.  Hence the core struggle of the same-sex marriage debate.  The issue is often framed in terms of fairness and dignity -- that somehow denying homosexuals a marriage license is akin to stripping them of the right to vote or drink from the same water fountains as other couples.  While it's easy to understand this point of view, it is every bit as important to realize that a homosexual relationship can never be "sacred" in any way.  It is a violation of the holy design at its root.  Try convincing a federal court of that, I know, but the principle is foundational to our nation and our faith.

Likewise, absent a permanent and unconditional commitment, a man and a woman can never complete each other in a sexual relationship.  A spiritual and sexual union between a man and a woman is the most precious bond that exists between people.  The Bible is emphatic on this point, even taking the bold step of comparing the marriage relationship to the bond between Jesus Christ and His church.  Physical intimacy outside of this design can't complete this picture.

Marriage is indeed a "big deal," and will be forever precious in God's eyes -- to a depth we cannot imagine.

 

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Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh?
Matthew 19:4-5