Men are failing.

Healthy marriages are rare, while collapsed unions have become the norm.  Wives often find a famine of sacrifice or intimacy from the knights they thought they married.  Not to mention the fact that the institution itself has been called into question by those wanting to change its definition or by those declaring it a relic of another age.  Children are deprived of disciplinarians and models who will establish firm boundaries and yet offer utmost love.  A nation finds "a few good men" to fight its wars, but what of the smaller battles back home?

Clearly, not every man carries the responsibility for a broken culture, but masculinity in general has fallen into disarray.  And the damage is extensive.  Not only have men taken lightly their supreme commitment to family, but many have become immersed in business and politics to the point that a word and a handshake too often represent an empty promise, rather than an immovable bond.

In times past, a man was expected to carry himself as a gentleman, expressing the highest deference to women and unflinchingly defending what is right and true.  But now, we regrettably see that kind of a man as an anomaly, an outdated antique not needed in our enlightened days of "equality" and "tolerance."

Political correctness has spurned the gentleman into a more passive role, lest he be accused of oppression or machismo.  Meanwhile, dishonesty and corruption are stereotypical of the corporate and political worlds.

Though I wouldn't consider it exhaustive, the failure runs deep.  And the weight of it falls on men, rather than women, because men have been entrusted -- by God, by tradition, and in general by law -- to be protectors of justice and beauty at home and in the world.  The movements of feminism and liberalism haven't changed that, although they have made it more difficult, to be sure.  But men are still called to be men, and boy, does the world need them.

To that end, author Brad Miner offers The Compleat Gentleman: The Modern Man's Guide to Chivalry, a book that traces the history of the gentlemanly ideal through ancient times to the knights of the Age of Chivalry up to the present-day dearth.

"This is a book about an ideal," writes Miner, "and the reader will find that a belief in the importance of aspiring to that ideal is treated here as nothing less than dogma.  No man behaves as a compleat gentleman all the time, but the best men never cease yearning to."

Part history and part modern application, The Compleat Gentleman explores how the gentleman has evolved, and it offers a charge to men today to reclaim the torch of chivalry.  The book does not, however, idealize the gentlemen of the past as many works are prone to do.  Rather, Miner writes of real men with real imperfections, but men who knew that honor and love were worth any sacrifice.

"And if one tenet of the contemporary worldview represents a heretical break with tradition, it is in the confident assertion that nothing is worth fighting for, which is to say, dying for," Miner says.  "Implied in this is the assumption that peace is always preferable to war and life is always preferable to death, and here the compleat gentleman dissents -- militantly -- even if he himself is not combat ready."

Indeed, of all the classical views of manhood, the one we are least comfortable with is that of a warrior.  Yet, that fighting spirit is what really defines a gentleman.  It is not limited to physical struggles (and no gentleman enters a man-to-man confrontation unless he's forced to), but at the heart of manliness, by and large, is a deep-seated fervor to conquer evil and to uphold good.

As Miner writes, "The compleat gentleman, as a warrior, cannot abide injustice, and justice is finally the one and only thing worth fighting and dying for.  Peace is justice in foreign relations; equality is justice in society; passion is justice in marriage; wisdom is justice in education; restraint is justice in behavior."

Along with this essence of a soldier comes -- whether as its supplement, or as its fuel -- what Miner describes as "the lover" and "the monk."  A lover because a gentleman is always seeking to please and romance his fair maiden; and a monk, because he ever carries the mantles of integrity and self-control.

Perhaps few men throughout time have actually achieved this ideal; certainly fewer have achieved their entire adult lives.  But in modern culture, even the ideal has been lost.  We owe it to today's man -- and maybe just as much to today's woman -- to push him to strive toward chivalry.  I don't think that's such a lofty objective.

"The compleat gentleman is merely a man," Miner writes, "and perhaps we make the process of defining chivalry too difficult because we lack the faith necessary to grasp its essential simplicity.  In the end, chivalry is nothing more than putting the self second…in the moments that matter the compleat gentleman makes himself the servant of his God, his nation, his friends, his family…."

The call of The Compleat Gentleman is extremely relevant, and the future of the culture demands that men stand up and bring honor to their God, family, country.  As a man myself, I certainly carry the weight of that burden, and pray for the strength to shoulder it.

I do think, however, that Miner perhaps underestimates the role of faith in the life of the gentleman.  He says: "If a gentleman is not per se religious, he is inherently monkish in that, like his cloistered and professed brethren, he is a man living under a dispensation of principles…even agnostic and atheist gentlemen (and there probably aren't many of the latter) are guided by at least one principle….He believes he ought to do the right thing."

Not that a Christian belief is required to be a just man, but without the abiding hope of eternal life and the conviction of a holy God, a man has little solid foundation upon which to base his pursuit of goodness.  After all, Christ is the pre-eminent gentleman -- the fiercest warrior, the most humble King, and the most caring lover.  Without His example and daily guidance, a man remains doomed to defeat.

Still, the message rings true -- and blares like an alarm bell to awaken a largely dormant concept.  Women deserve men who will fight for their beauty, and who would put their very lives on the line on behalf of their beloved.  Children deserve fathers who will model real manliness, provide security, and teach truth.  And a nation deserves men who will be intolerant toward injustice.  Men who will stand uncompromisingly for their faith and their loved ones.  May the knights ride again.